What is an initial consultation?

An initial consultation gives you the opportunity to consider if counselling can meets your needs and requirements.Sessions can be online, by phone, or in person and usually lasts up to 30minutes. At the end of the consultation, you may be asked if you would like to book your first session. If you are unsure or not ready, there should be no pressure or expectation for you to do so. It is perfectly acceptable to make a decision at your own time and pace. 

  Are my reasons enough for counselling?

Your reasons for counselling are unique and personal to you. If you feel the need to talk to someone who can support you with empathy and understanding, without opinions, advice, or judgment, then counselling is here for you.  

Some may be everyday life experiences such as work-related issues, relationship struggles, dynamics of family and friends. There may also be more complex reasons such as someone living with grief and loss, or significant mental health concerns such as high functioning stress or anxiety. 

What if I don't know what's wrong?

You don’t need to know what’s wrong to start counselling, and  you don’t need to find the right words to say what you are thinking and feeling. It’s your story, in your words, your own way.

 Can I bring more than one problem?

 You can bring more than one reason. For example, if you are experiencing a bereavement, you may also be feeling stress or anxiety. You may be managing or struggling with family conflict or dynamics. Work-related stress, issues, or pressure can also be supported. You may find more reasons appear during your counselling journey - and that’s more than ok.

 Do I need to tell you everything?

In counselling your life story does not need to be complete  for understanding and support to begin.You are always in control of what you choose to share.  As trust and connection develops, you may feel more confident or willingness to disclose more than you first intended.  The right counsellor should not pressure or manipulate you to discuss anything you are not ready for - it’s your session your way - always. 

 How do I know you won't tell anyone?

This question is usually considered when questioning confidentiality when a counsellor asks for personal, or emergency contact details. All counsellors should provide a confidentiality agreement. This agreement explains the limits of confidentiality for example: specific form of illegal activity, harm to yourself or others, of any safeguarding concerns.Your details are taken purely for record-keeping and insurance purposes. It should not be used for contacting yourself or others, for any reason without permisson. You can always specify how and when you prefer your details to be used. If you feel a counsellor may have used your details for unethical purposes, you can speak to them first or alternatively contact their professional body such as the BACP for guidance and support. 

How do I know my personal details are safe and secure?

Your personal information should always be stored securely and handled in accordance with GDPR and professional ethical guidelines. You have the right to ask your counsellor about their policies and procedures regarding storage of your personal details.

 I'm worried about being judged.

Feeling judged about our situation and circumstances can stem from the reactions of others when we have discussed with them our past or present experiences. We may have also learned that sharing our emotions or expressing our feelings is not accepable or appropriate.

Counsellors hear a wide range of reasons and experiences of why people choose to seek professional support. We are here to support you - not to judge you. 

What if I say something embarrassing or become emotional?

Embaressment can sometimes be felt if you have discussed a personal, or private situation and have received an unsupported experience. You may have been ignored, ridiculed, dismissed or made to feel that this behaviour is not acceptable or appropriate. You may have learned that expressing emotion  is shameful, weak, or embarrassing. Its understandable that you may  feel this way.Learning to communicate effectively can bring supressed thoughts and feelings to the surface in a non-judgemental space. Our thoughts, feelings, and emotions are there to be expressed, in a safe and trusting space - and thats ok. 

What is a modality?

A modality describes the way a counsellor works.

My approach is Person-Centred Counselling. This means there are no personal goals to set or expectations. Each session is created by you, this includes what you want to say, how you want to say it, and when. I offer no opinions, advice, judgment, or comparisons of other similar experiences. I am here to listen with empathy and understanding and support you to make sense of who you are and why. You are the expert on your own life - it’s your thoughts feelings and experiences that is what counts - no one else’s.  

What is expected of me in counselling?

The expectations of a counsellor will usually be outlined within the counselling agreement.

The most common include:

• Agreement of sessions - Day and Time
• Cancellation policy and fees
• Regular Attendance (Usually Weekly)
• Payment procedures and agreement of service charge.

A counsellor would like you to understand who they are, how they can support you, and if they are the right counsellor for you. This includes creating a trusting and safe working relationship, to support you through the emotional and physical experiences that you may feel. There is also an expectation that you attend counselling, of your own free will, and not at someone else’s insistence or manipulation. Simply being willing to engage with the process and being yourself is enough.

Do I need a private space?

The answer to this question is yes. If you have face-to-face counselling, then you should be allocated a room that is private and quiet, with no opportunity for the session to be overheard.If your sessions are online, then you would need to ensure you have a private and quiet space to engage in the sessions fully.

 Why is this important?

As sessions continue you can gain confidence and improve your communication regarding your reasons for counselling.If you fear or know you may be overheard, this can prevent you from fully engaging with the process, slowing or even halting your progress and growth. You may also discover aspects of your life that you have never processed or spoken out before. If you are overheard, you may feel the need or pressure to disclose personal experiences about the topic that you may not have wanted to disclose discuss.

What if I start sharing and it feels like too much?

When you first start counselling, you may be fearful of showing vulnerability and worry about communicating and explaining your reasons for counselling. As you experience - sometimes for the first time - a trusting, safe non-judgmental environment where you can be your true self, you can gain confidence and reveal more than you are were willing to disclose. That’s ok and its very common. You are always in control of what you share, how and when, if you say something and then feel you are not ready to explore the topic further, you have the right to say so. 

You may say “I don’t want to go there” “Can we stop” “change the subject” “discuss it another time’ It’s ok to find your way and say it.

What if I agree to counselling but later change my mind?

You can decide that counselling may no longer meet your needs at any time. 

Reasons for this could be:

• Feeling Overwhelmed or stressed in sessions
• Fear of attending due to mental health concerns.
• Unable to keep session commitments - unavailable.
• Financial reasons
• Feeling that your reasons for counselling have been resolved. 

No matter the reason, it is your right and choice to end sessions when you choose. Counsellors will have cancellation policies that may need to be considered. 

A planned session ending is also important to ensure you leave feeling supported and confident as you move forwards. If possible, you may be able to return to the same counsellor in the future for further support. This would be subject to session availability, and each individual counsellors’ policies and procedures. Speak to your counsellor for further details.

What happens if I miss a session?

Counsellors understand that sometimes life can get in the way, even when you have set appointments or regular commitments. It is, however, important to consider that missing a session can pause the process of counselling. This absence can leave you feeling alone, unsupported, and with unprocessed thoughts and feelings. This can be a missed opportunity to discuss realisations or reflections from the previous session. Each counsellor will have their own policies and procedures for cancelling sessions. Speak to yours about theirs if you are unsure.

What if I am pressured to attend counselling?

The person who asks you to attend counselling or offers to pay for the service, usually  can have good intentions. They can feel that it is the best and the only solution to resolving the person’s issues.

Pressuring or manipulating someone to attend counselling sessions only fuels refusal, resentment and defiance. In some circumstances attendance can be confirmed, and payment sent, but the client is repeatedly unreachable or not available. Positive change has to come from within, and from the person who wants to change. If they can’t or won’t, it is their right and their choice - and for the helper a hard place to be in - I know I have been there. 

What’s more empowering: not knowing how to swim and being thrown in, or acheiving this goal by finding and choosing a suitable swimming instructor yourself?

What if I don't like my counsellor?

This usually means that the counsellor is not the right fit for you. The relationship between counsellor and client is one of the most important parts of the counselling process. There  can be many reasons for this, or it may simply be that their training and services are not suitable for your needs or requirements. For example, they may be CBT trained and you need a person-centred counsellor.

If your dislike is because you are questioning their professional or personal capabilities, then again you can find out who their professional body is and speak to them directly, or cancel sessions.

What training do you have?

I am a registered member of the BACP (MBACP) and hold a BSc (Hons) in Counselling and Psychotherapy, alongside a CPCAB Level 4 Diploma in Therapeutic Counselling. I also undertake regular continuing professional development (CPD) to ensure my knowledge and skills remain up to date.

Thank you for taking the time to read these frequently asked questions. 

I hope they have helped you gain a better understanding of the counselling process and answered some of the questions you may have had. If you have any further questions about counselling, or would like to know more about my service, please feel free to use the contact form below. I will be happy to help.

Take care.
Lynda Peters (MBACP)
BACP Registration Number: 411958
BSc (HONS) Counselling & Psychotherapy 
Shropshire | West Midlands
Online & Telephone Counselling Across the UK